Bit of help? [Fight scenes]

[lesandytomato]

Hey guys!

I'd like some advice on choreographing fight scenes, if anyone who's had experience writing them would be so kind as to share their wisdom. I am just absolutely horrid at writing fight scenes; they turn out boring and choppy, and I'd like to know. How do you guys write yours? What works, and what doesn't? What are some common mistakes people make when writing fight scenes? Thanks a lot. :>

Cheers!
-sand

Comments

[roane]

I've only written them a few times. For me, the biggest thing is to make sure you have a clear mental image of WHERE everyone is in relation to each other. Map it out if you need to. (If you know any old-school RPG players, I guarantee one of them probably has a hex-map and some minis!) Also, a clear understanding of why each character is fighting--what their motive is, what they're trying to achieve. Survival? Winning? Escape? What's the setting? What can be used as impromptu weaponry? Where can someone dive for cover? Just like writing any other scene, if you know what everybody wants, you'll have a clearer picture of where to go.

It helped me to pay attention when watching fight scenes on TV and in movies. Gave me a few ideas for tactics. Also helped when trying to visually describe what was going on.

I actually kind of like writing fight scenes now. Just like sex scenes, they work best for me (reading AND writing) if they stay about the characters and less about the mechanics.

[lesandytomato]

Thank you! This really helped. My main problem is that I'm always scrambling to get down all the details of the fight, and in the end I have no idea what I'm doing or who's supposed to be winning and it just turns out to be a total disaster. This cleared a lot of that up. Thanks again. :>

[roane]

You're totally welcome. I've gotten a lot of help out of this community so far. Happy to pass something along. :)

[dragonfly]

This, exactly. Besides having a clear picture of where everyone is, I would add, go from character to character, at least in your own head, giving each one a "turn," even if the action is close to happening all at once.

[lesandytomato]

Thanks! I have a habit of doing this anyway, and I'm glad that it's something that should be done.

[xtricks]

Do you write porn? Action scenes and sex scenes have odd similarities. You need to set up a rising tension to a climax and a post climax relaxation - just like porn.

[lesandytomato]

Uh, I actually don't write porn, but I think I get the idea. Thanks. :,D

[enemytosleep]

One thing I try to remember is that when you've got fast-moving action (AKA a fight scene), be concise. So:

Ed crouched low and pivoted, kicking out with his leg.

instead of:

Ed crouched low, using his hands to balance himself as he kept his weight on the ball of one foot, using the other to kick out at his opponent.

You want the reader to follow the action "real time" and not lose track of what's happening in extraneous details. If Ed is spinning in a low kick, the reader can reasonably imagine that he'd be balancing with his hands with his weight on one foot. The same idea goes for introspection and observation. If Ed's in the middle of a fist fight, he's not likely going to keep pondering his dilemma with Ling or notice the color of the candles in the hotel lobby. Keep it simple and keep the reader engaged and moving forward.

I tend to write really rough choreography first (Ed high punch: Greed blocks and grabs wrist.) and then go and make it a bit smoother. I also tend to rewatch some fight scenes for inspiration, too.

Good luck!

[lesandytomato]

Ah, this addressed one of my biggest problems directly! Thanks so much for your input!

[enemytosleep]

Glad it could help!

[0jack]

I write some decent fight scenes, according to readers.

First thing to do is to narrow down the focus to your POV character. This limits the information to the reader and causes greater anxiety and investment.

Second is to put detail into sensory information, mostly smell and sound, then feel, then vision. Vision in a fight narrows a lot to only vital points. Sound, which is 360-degree detail, becomes important. Sense of smell can be overwhelming with fear sweat, blood, gun powder, hot metal. Taste goes with smell when the character inhales. Touch becomes muddled because pain senses are blocked off, but impact registers dully.

Third is time. Time changes when adrenaline is pumping. Some moments slow down like cold molasses, others are gone and only leave the evidence that they happened behind. Five minutes of close quarters sword fighting can be over in an instant, but diving for a lost sword can take an eternity.

Fourth is emotional impact. Pick out the moments in the fight that will matter to and change your POV character or other characters involved. Match those up with slow-time moments or pauses in the fray so that the emotional impact doesn't seem out of place. You want to make sure the reader understands the gravity of the situation, so again, pinpoint the emotion that you want to get across: fear of failure, the brief memory of a task undone, the awareness that one has lost track of a loved one, etc.

Fifth is continuity. Pick an image or emotion or a goal and carry it through the combat. That will help hold your scene together. This means you can segue (blur the action into a sentence or two) between pivotal moments and the reader will be focused and carry along with you.

I hope that helps some. :)

[lesandytomato]

This was very precise and hit so many points that I needed. Thanks a lot. :D

[insignia]

This is a very helpful comment ♥

[linaewen]

Wow, this is all really helpful to me, too! I'm stalled in several of my long-running WIPs because I can't get the feel of the battles my characters are facing. I almost feel like I might be able to press forward now after reading these suggestions.

Thanks for asking for help! :-D

[lesandytomato]

Lol no problem! This is such a helpful community. :D

[outstretched]

I'm a bit late, and everyone else is a lot more eloquent than me XD, but I wanted to say that sentence construction is also important! It should echo what's going on in the scene. Short choppy sentences lend themselves well to explosive, fast movement, and can help build excitement when reading. Inversely, long stream-of-consciousness sentences/passages (when used sparingly) can add a sense of tension, because the sentence goes on and on without ever resolving. This kind of writing is best built with lots of dashes, from what I've found. Um, here's an example from a fic I wrote:

They were both skidding fast on the slick ice and the spinning was fading just in time for Green to see how far up they really were now, and oh God—

He scrambled for the Pidgeot on his belt, his numb fingers refusing to work, and just as they both fell completely over the edge, he clutched the Poké Ball firmly in his hand—

And then his fingers slipped—

And they fell off the cliff, Green's shout mixing with Eevee's high cry, the Poké Ball flying out of his fingers, and they were falling and the Poké Ball was just inches away and he could practically see the Pokémon inside of it but it was just out of reach, just too far—

A roar shook the air, and they collided hard with the orange blur that caught them.

It's...not exactly a fight scene, but you can see what I mean about stream-of-consciousness writing. As I got further along in the scene I also took more and more punctuation out, so that the words seem to "run faster" as you get to the end. If you do this type of writing too much, though, it gets boring/tiring.

I totally concur with everyone else, too, where you need to keep fight-writing really focused—character thoughts (if any) should be narrowed in on the problem at hand, and spartan (lol) descriptions should be used. Avoid adverbs even more than usual when writing fight scenes, and make your verbs do all the heavy lifting!

Also, when I'm having trouble grasping a fight scene, I often act it out irl. That sounds super dorky, I know, but I feel like it really helps me get the physicality of it down and leads to more natural character reactions, because I'm less inventing actions and more describing what I've observed.

Best of luck with your writing!

[lesandytomato]

This is fantastic! Thanks so much. :>